Image courtesy of sveeta's photostream on Flickr.com
Great reading today in One Day at a Time (p183).
“Being able to love without trying to interfere with or control anyone else, however close to me- that is what I search for and can find in Al-Anon.”
I struggle so much with my expectation of the Ideal Husband. I constantly measure myself against these rigorous internal standards, and I guess I measure everyone else by them too. Thanks to program, I’ve let go of a LOT of my old Type-A craziness. I am still working on my expectations. However, I still have this deep-seated battle between “settling” and accepting reality.
It’s the little things: political views, household habits, values when it comes to money… Intellectually, I know that no one is perfect (including me!), and I will not find someone who meets my every specification like a custom-made shoe. In my head, though, I still think that my way is right.
I find myself frustrated with my partner’s “closed-mindedness,” his opinion that addiction is merely a matter of weakness and willpower that the addict needs to exert, his non-program ways of dealing with things that come up (like bad drivers, delays, conflicts, etc.). At these times, I have to remember to respect his journey even if I don’t like it, even if I wish it paralleled mine a bit more (ha ha – looked more like mine? Me, me, me- it’s all about me, huh?). 
I love my partner for who he is, not who I want him to be.
